Ai, pobre Yorick!

in: A Vida e Opiniões de Tristram Shandy, Antígona, 1997.

Rhinoplasty

When Trim came in and told my father, that Dr. Slop was in the kitchen, and busy in making a bridge—my uncle Toby——the affair of the jack-boots having just then raised a train of military ideas in his brain——took it instantly for granted that Dr. Slop was making a model of the marquis d’Hôpital’s bridge.——’Tis very obliging in him, quoth my uncle Toby;—pray give my humble service to Dr. Slop, Trim, and tell him I thank him heartily.

Had my uncle Toby’s head been a Savoyard’s box, and my father peeping in all the time at one end of it——it could not have given him a more distinct conception of the operations of my uncle Toby’s imagination, than what he had; so, notwithstanding the catapulta and battering-ram, and his bitter imprecation about them, he was just beginning to triumph——

When Trim’s answer, in an instant, tore the laurel from his brows, and twisted it to pieces.

CHAPTER XXVII

——This unfortunate draw-bridge of yours, quoth my father——God bless your honour, cried Trim, ’tis a bridge for master’s 
nose.——In bringing him into the world with his vile instruments, he has crushed his nose, Susannah says, as flat as a pancake to his face, and he is making a false bridge with a piece of cotton and a thin piece of whalebone out of Susannah’s stays, to raise it up.

——Lead me, brother Toby, cried my father, to my room this instant.

Forceps

"——And pray, good woman, after all, will you take upon you to say, it may not be the child’s hip, as well as the child’s head?———’Tis most certainly the head, replied the midwife. Because, continued Dr. Slop (turning to my father) as positive as these old ladies generally are—’tis a point very difficult to know—and yet of the greatest consequence to be known;——because, Sir, if the hip is mistaken for the head—there is a possibility (if it is a boy) that the forceps * * * * * * "

Upside down

But the cover illustration? — is this also a upside down? — And where is the instrument — the new invented ultra modern forceps of Dr. Slop?

Letra Livre

—"But try perhaps the "Letra Livre" in Calçada do Combro said an antiquarian in one of the Livrarias — and indeed, yes a portuguese edition — A Vida e Opiniões de Tristram Shandy in two volumes published by Antígona in 1997 — was present on the shelf at Letra Livre. 

"— Não senhor...

...Infelizmente" was the polite answer from many of Lisbons antiquarians on the introducing question: "Do you have a copy of the portuguese edition of A Vida e Opiniões de Tristram Shandy ? ...Obrigada"—("And if we did have a copy; what on earth would you do with Tristram Shandy in portuguese, when your portuguese obviously are so poorly?) could the following part of the answer very well have been.